qwertymonk's Post
7 feeling sick before bed trying to get 3 down By: via qwertymonk
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torn between helping one boy build his minecraft lego set and the other begging to make a gingerbread house then switching to train set and all the messes taunting me and somewhere in there able to deposit xmas money and finally pay for the recording program i’ve been using for the past few months By: via qwertymonk
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anyway one of the crappy apps has some interesting sounds that if i strip most of it away i can move around enough to make something interesting in a stupid way that guitar and vocals and other things can fill out properly and that is the whole reason i downloaded all these things By: via qwertymonk
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i have deleted half the music making apps i downloaded the other night due to their false advertising and lack authenticity or genuineness so to speak they just seem like they're out to make money not music although to give them the benefit of the doubt i would say they are at least attempting to create community but i don't really believe that because it feels more like part of the money making undertow to entice you by being able to show your friends the music your making By: via qwertymonk
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last night after boys fell asleep i accidentally pushed on the app store and scrolled and there was a list of music apps for making beats and dance like music and i found myself reading the descriptions and the reviews and downloading every free one on the list and now i look forward to playing around with them to trying to fuck it up until something interesting comes out By: via qwertymonk
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at first interesting but overall left me feeling angry about the privilege around getting perfect sleep and the billions of people who cannot insert the perfect sleep schedule intro their chaotic existence not all the other attributes that lead to good sleep and therefore ‘good health’ By: via qwertymonk
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we finally sit down so 7 can read to us and what starts out equally frustrating turns into 3 falling asleep in my lap and 7 finishing his books me getting 3 into his bed and under the covers while dog barks at me because she thinks i’m going to bed with him and she wants to sleep by me almost waking the poor child but i escape without waking him up By: via qwertymonk
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from a friend today: Things I appreciate about Erik: . Fucking honesty . No holds bar questioning . A sincere smile . I don't care, I'm doing it anyway brand empathy . I don't care how that attempt went last time, I'm trying it again anyway brand empathy . Yes, fuck yes, compassion . Deep breath compassion . Noodley fingers . Curiosity . No, I don't know ability . The 56 pound heart . Once again, with feeling . Salty tears . Strength . Soar back stamina . Warriorship in the face of nappiness . Love . love . LOVE By: via qwertymonk
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boys fighting when we get back then food and crazy time in the basement with dad which is me we hear mom which is wife yell that santa is here and run upstairs to fire department caravan collecting toys for tots with santa installed atop and big red engine the firefighter running around collecting toys so chat with our neighbors and throw out toys in the bin and go back inside to warm up By: via qwertymonk
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lying next to one boy for over an hour then the other one needs me another hour of not sleeping but exhausted and cranky exercising patience beyond my limited understanding and witnessing intense klesha and neurosis finally both are asleep in spite of wife almost waking the second one and now i am so cranky and overtired i just want to smash things and play my amp as loud as possible and destroy matter and scream and bleed and thrust the earth into the sun but i’ll lay here and breathe and not know and not know what to do with not knowing and really not know that is most important By: via qwertymonk
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get an overdrive pedal in the mail from my mom's partner he had drawn my name from the hat and asked what i wanted and i had just found the pedal online and sent him the link so here it is right in my house sounding as amazing as they said it would online for only twenty bucks i can hardly believe it a brand new pedal almost always costs at least fifty if not a lot more and boutique pedals in the two hundreds and up sometimes very satisfying to have this little bugger since i've never had anything like it and always wanted something like it By: via qwertymonk
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pretty much good news from her even though he's in the lower average for some reading stuff we all think it's more due to his two years in chinese immersion with very little formal english instruction and we've seen a lot of progress this year around his reading ability especially when he gets over his attitude toward it By: via qwertymonk
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we had to leave the window there and as i was trying to get an uncooperative 3 back to the car all the purchases came rushing into my memory the gifts for family the kitchen stuff we needed three new pairs of gloves extra alcohol for wife's work xmas party smart watch new phone coffee maker family photos and photo books and having those photos put on xmas cards and sent out on and on and on By: via qwertymonk
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wife heads out into it at the last minute to get a few things we need whiel 3 melts down and then 7 and then 3 and then 7 makes funny pictures on snapchat to send to mom and i'm not sure how to get 3 out of his screaming inferno nuclear tantrum has he's pounding me while i type this By: via qwertymonk
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wife is wiped out and useless and i don’t blame her as the boys fight and battle and instigate and perform all naughty acts they can muster and i tool around trying to referee exasperated while cooking simple dumb food to get us all fed with my goal of getting them in front of a goddamn movie so we can breathe for ninety minutes By: via qwertymonk
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i am a member of an avant-garde writing list-serv that i have been neglecting for a while and this morning i just dropped everything and read this one genius's poem with word suicide repeated in the juxtaposed ways that were revealing and helpful and again i felt the value of what poetry and writing can do and also felt the subtle longing to do some writing myself the kind i used to do but probably updated into something i haven't yet conceived of until it arrives with a hammer and a bucket of nails By: via qwertymonk
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on the other hand we are in a phase with little to no room for error or down time me time alone time and we want to live our lives so having a drink is celbrating life and some good food and if i can exercise and meditate in there somewhere too all the better much less record music and listen to others music By: via qwertymonk
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the way the new phones work is remarkable and with high tech lenses in my new bold frames with blue blocking capabilities and high definition coupled with the extreme high quality of the phone screen has my brain wondering how to react but it has been mostly pleasurable and also frustrating when there is no time to play around with the brand new toy fun distraction By: via qwertymonk
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i lost a bunch of passwords and recordings and some beats that i really liked that i was going to record guitar with soon but it was worth the fresh start and at least one of the beats i know i can recreate because it's a beat that has been coming through me for the last year or two and if i sit down and transcribe it i know i can make it happen and even get a better voicing from the drum machine By: via qwertymonk
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inserting a new device into that continuous stream of activity brought me great anxiety at first and i wanted to get all my stuff transferred to help me not lose all my passwords and tracks i've recorded and beats i've made but i slowly started setting up each up one by one instead and rather enjoyed the fresh start of leaving so many things behind and starting afresh once again By: via qwertymonk
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i use my phone all day and night every day and night mostly not staring at it but streaming music from it sending texts and emails back and forth while running errands making grocery lists and using the app for the store i'm in for discounts looking up how fix something on google or youtube writing for this channel reading the news or school updates weather updates recording music and using noise apps for soundscaping documenting our boys with photos and sharing with family and friends all over the world By: via qwertymonk
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when she was out picking up a few things we needed on black friday she talked to the techs at target and they had a deal if you buy a new phone you get a huge amount of an apple watch and we were going to get her one anyway to help with her health and to look more powerful at meetings with ignorant old white men By: via qwertymonk